Is that white noise or a crying baby?

I can't tell the difference these days. Trains, fans, static all cause it. I've conferred with other fathers on this topic and they concur. When will it stop?

Lent

Today is Ash Wednesday; a day all good Catholics get ashes, fast (no snacking and only one large meal), abstain from eating meat and give something up for 40 days. This year, I've decided to give up caffeine. Yeah I know it's suicide, but I'm trying to see how it will affect me. Stay tuned; so far, I'm already starting to doze off after lunch.

The sling fails me

No worky tonight.

The sling

This sling thing has got to be the best thing for a father. Put your baby in this over-the-shoulder-baby-holder and walk around without any worries. She actually sleeps in it; quite amazing. I walk up and down stairs and all over the house.
Link to product: http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2663262

Try to "contain yourself"

Oh how I love to hate the Container Store. Why? Well, it's very complicated really and has a lot to do with my own lack of planning, short temper and I hate waiting just to be waited-on.

Today is the last day of the "annual elfa sale". Everything is 30% off. That's a big deal because their crap is already 50% more expensive than anything you could find at Home Depot or Menards or Ace. That means the place was going to be jammed with last-minute shoppers (even though it was Super Bowl weekend). Women love this store. Somehow, it's more approachable than a hardware store. I digress. Let me tell you why I hate it.

1)The stores are not designed well
2)They have tiny shopping carts
3)You can't grab all the items by yourself; someone must "design" a solution for you

4a)They have this type of shelving in black, but not that.

4b)They have this width of shelf, but not in that color

4c)They have this width of shelf in this color, but not in that depth

1)The stores are all the same; all the same poor layout. It's like the difference from an old Wal-Mart store and a new one. The aisles are cramped and there's no room for the crappy little shopping carts they give you. That leads me to #2.

2)The shopping carts can't hold 5% of the items they sell. They make their bread and butter off of shelving; none of which will actually fit in the cart. However, they take the opportunity to hide most of the items you would like to pick out by yourself, but don't have room in the tiny little carts. That leads me to #3.

3)Many items you need to complete your shelving aren't actually on the storeroom floor and available to the customer to pick out. You must first speak to a "designer" who will kindly walk you through the 15,000 options available and determine what you "need". Then, they create a picking list for a pro to fill up an appropriately-sized cart and bring it to your car.

4)It's flexible, but not flexible at the same time. I expressed that to them at Container Store and they really didn't have much of an answer for me. Anyhow, let me tell you about my experience over the weekend.

I bought my HDTV (love it more each day) and decided I wanted all my home theater hardware (DVD player, AMP, TiVO, etc.) to be on the wall just like the LCD HDTV. I wanted a mantel above the TV. I know what I wanted to do, but could not find a pre-packaged piece of hardware to accomplish the task. I figured all was lost; until I went to the Container Store to purchase and unrelated shelving rack for my back kitchen. We showed up at about 10:30am Saturday afternoon.

After deciding to purchase the product for my kitchen, Nancy was very nice and helped explain how I could accomplish what I wanted to accomplish for my home theater and do it with the style that I wanted to portray. I wanted black wood shelfing and I wanted it to be a clean installation where the mouting hardware was "hidden". It's impossible to hide everyting completely, but that's where I was headed.

The Container Store is known for their Elfa shelving which until recently has been all ventilated shelves. Now they have wood shelving that work with the same brackets so all is right in the world. I designed the solution with Nancy's help and took the drawings home to sit on it for a bit. After going home and thinking about it, Katie and I decided to return to the store to pull the trigger.

I needed to make a few modifications to the original plan - longer this, shorter that, etc. However, in order to do that, I had to speak to a designer (some trained gal who has access to a computer terminal with my saved plans from earlier in the day). It's now about 5pm Saturday night and the wait to see a designer requires a pager and to get in line. After waiting 45 minutes with my pager (with a 2-month old daughter in tow), I found out that there were 7 more people still in front of me. Holy Crap. Painful. After all was said and done, we were out the door at 7pm. It took two hours to do "longer this, shorter that".

I got home and put it all together. After installing all the components and looking at it for a bit, I realized that 20" shelves were way too deep and I needed something shallower. Unfortunately, there is no other option than to go with 16" deep shelves. I could also use a 12" deep shelf, but those only come in 24" widths, not the 48" I desire. So, you see how this becomes an issue quickly and it's flexible, but it's not flexible.

I return the next morning at 11:00am to return the wrong parts and buy the new ones. Given that it took me two hours the last time, I figured it would not be as bad and I could simply grab what I wanted and move on. That was not the case. There was a 15-person deep line to just GET a pager. Crazy. I choose to bypass all that and just pick out the items that I needed and move on.

Well it just so happens that the shelves that I want are not accessible to the average customer; you must speak to a designer to have them "picked" from the storeroom for you (sSee issue #3). Anyhow, I came to grips with the fact that I would have to pay full price for the shelves and would come back another day. In the meantime, I would grab what I could (like a looter) and get on with my day.

As I get to the register, I had this wonderful idea - I'm going to complain. As a general rule, I go with the flow because I know these rules exist for a reason. They are usually in place to protect the average idiot shopper from themselves. As I was taking items out of my cart, I asked the cashier why I was not able to pick all the items I wanted simply by hand. I explained that I simply needed some shelves to finish off my ensemble. I had already swapped out the 20" brackets for 16" brackets and returned the 20" shelves. I also said that it took me two hours yesterday and I didn't need to speak to a designer (as I didn't need their assistance). She replied, "I can grab those items for you, what do you want?". I was floored. I told her the items, she brought them back and I was on my way. What genius.

After getting home and setting everything up, I realized that I bought the wrong brackets and had to return YET AGAIN (the fourth time in 2 days). Finally, I grabbed the proper brackets, returned the improper brackets and headed home.

Just before the Giants and Patriots kicked off, I had the shelving complete and all was right in the world. I feel victorious.

Two months old

Our daughter is two months old yesterday. What a great deal of changes in only 8 weeks time. She used to only make one noise - DEFCON 1. Now, she's more subtle in her alerting. You can tell that she is hungry, tired or has a soiled diaper. Leaps and bounds better. She slept six hours straight the ohter night.

That's huge; epecially since Katie told me yesterday that she thought she was coming down with the flu. She was tired and had an upset stomach. I said, "You cannot get ill... Don't let it happen."

Worth his weight in gold

And at over $900 per ounce, that comes to $4,248,000. Okay, so maybe not that much. Let me tell you why he is worth somewhere between that figure and $500.

In November, I figured it might be worth my time to investigate purchasing a snow blower. Since we were on track to go HD, I would have to settle for a used model. Cue Brian's keen eye.

Weeks later, he alerted me that one of his coworkers (Mark) has a neighbor who is looking to seel an old Ariens 5 HP two-stage snow thrower. That's right up my alley. The cost - $150. That unit would cost about $700 new, so I figured I would have a look at it. It took some starter fluid and fresh gas, but she started and ran and I bought it.

Brian once again helped me out by tearing apart and replacing the fuel line, primer line, oil and spart plug. A simple fix, but it's nice to have help. Ever since that work, she has ran like a champ. She has electric start, so there is no need to even prime anymore...

So, why all this talk about worth his weight in gold? Well, it's been the snowiest Chicago winter in 25 years and we've gotten over 14" of snow in the past few days. Without Brian, I'd be shoveling every hour just to stay ahead. I did that for the first few snowfalls this year before I realized a power tool was the way to go.

His value:
Snow blower - $550
Flooring labor - $2,000
Motorcycle tourgide - $4,000
Other help - $?,????
Advice - $?,???